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Tuesday 8 October 2013

Why so emotional?

Day 26: 02/10/13 Okay this blog entry might not be thaat interesting as it doesn´t have any peaking moments in it, but I said that I would share the good, bad and everything in between. Also, please do not pay attention to the gramatical and spelling errors in this as this laptop is in a spanish setting and only recognises spanish words - therefore no auto correct. So, today was a challenging day in the way that I went through so many emotions in one day and I don´t quite know what to think of it. I was happy, bored, upset, embarrassed, sensitive, positive, excited, impressed and now... confused My morning started off just as it usually does, around 6.15am. I wake up, do whatever girls do in the bathroom for half an hour, get breakfast, make lunch, clean up everything after myself (so that my mum doesn´t tell me off when i get home) and leave for school, tired but quite happy. I love having this time to myself in the morning, with no one else awake! I had a nice coffee (i don´t even like coffee, but i am so tired all the time that i feel as though i need it), and i had chocolate cereal. I left for school at 7.40am as usual and really enjoyed my nice walk to school, with the temperatura just right, and some music to listen to. I listen to the same 10 songs over and over because there is no good music on my phone, but oh well. I´m always quite happy until I actually arrive at school, realising that i will then have to go inside and be locked away for the day. But today, that wasn´t the real problem. The problem was that, in Geography class there are never many seats and always a lot of students. So when i walk into the classroom i find that there are only a of couple seats left, one next to this creepy guy who doesn´t talk, another next to this guy who looks like he´s too cool for everyone and one next to this guy that i had spoken to once before. So, obviously i casually sit down next to the guy i know. A few minutes later this girl strolls into the class room late and she looks at me, annoyed, because apparently i took her seat. Now, there are no certain seating plans here so, to me, it wasn´t a big deal. But she starts getting all up in my face, in spanish, telling me to move, but i say no. I wasn´t being rude but i genuinely just didn´t want to sit with the guy who doesn´t talk and just stares. But the girl really just wanted her own way, she was making a big deal out of it and really embarrassing me making me look stupid because i couldn´t respond fast enough. Now i really didn´t want to cry but i think that she just made me tip. I mean it´s hard enough coming to a new country, family and school without her being a... you know. I just think i felt particularly sensitive and couldn´t stop myself from crying, consequently i had to leave class because i knew i had to calm my silly self down. I got stopped by some english speaking teachers (i was sobbing at this point) and i told them i wanted to go home. They refused to let me leave and instead they let me go and sit in the cafetería and calm myself haha. The lovely cafetería people gave me a coffee and a lolly. That was nice. After an hour i returned to class and basically acted as if nothing happened. In the end, i think that crying and making a fuss turned out to be a positive thing. This is because the teachers realised that i was actually unhappy with school and how things were going. I told them about how unwelcome i felt (they didn´t even know i was an Exchange student) and how i was upset about having absolutely nothing to do in class. In New Zealand i worked my butt off to get good grades and here i didn´t even have a colouring in book to do during class. I was soo bored. I told them that i knew they couldn´t slow down the pace of the clases but the least i expected was a book to work from, or to just read. Consequently, some of the teachers have now given me some books to flick through. That was the main part of my day, but the best part of my day was that i discovered the rule to the future tense verbs in spanish. This means that i unlocked several new words for myself to use in conversation. When i got home from school i was able to have a decent conversation with my host mum (with help from a spanish, english dictionary). I was very impressed with myself. I´m just wishing that i had some spanish lessons at school rather than sitting in catalán classes doing individual work.

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